Track 7: Selections from "Writhe!"

"Writhe!" was recorded at Clazzy Studios in Hendersonville, TN, in two 4-hour sessions in 2002.

Never intended as a full production, I was simply collecting a few songs I had sitting around. I don't know that it holds up, and many of the tunes are throwaways that were never played live. But there are curiosities and a handful that are worth putting the spotlight on... 
 

Alibi
Written in 2002

This was one of those numbers that magically write themselves. It took all of 10 minutes to compose, but I had no idea where I was going with it, I just went with the muse. It ended up a story of betrayal, drawn from several sources. Good harmonies, and a neat stabbing guitar sound during the chorus.... though I slipped up at one point during the recording. I don't believe I ever played it live - I wrote it, then recorded it, and that was it.

Lyrics

Cover my tracks, bury the past

Avoid all your questions, but that doesn't last

You're like a surgeon, cut to the heart

With deadly precision, uncover my part

Alibi's, alibi's, trying to gild the treason with my lies

Alibi's, alibi's, trying to cover the pain in your eyes

Don't look at me, don't look at me, you are tearing down these walls

What's the point, what's the point, in bouncing echoes off these empty halls

Alibi's

Why are you haunted by ghosts, can we bury our dead?

Will you never let go, get it out of my head

You're like a surgeon, cut to the heart

With deadly precision, uncover my part

Broken Lullabye
Written on May 12, 2001

Nashville could be bliss, I learned a lot there, but it was also a machine, one that I was struggling to fit in with. I think this is a pretty tune, difficult to play in spots (and you can hear a few screw-ups), but pretty. It was one of my audition songs for the Bluebird Cafe. I also played it at the Douglas Corner Cafe, in the round, with 3 other musicians, one of whom had a violin. It wasn't rehearsed, but they accompanied me, and after I thanked them because it was such a beautiful addition. I wish I'd had them for the recording.

Lyrics

I've seen firsthand, how useless and vain

Crying to drown out the pain

I have tried by force of will

But I am a failure still   

I wasn't built for the world at large

Like wings of a dragonfly, I can't be heard above the din of the machine

With my broken lullaby

I have sang till my heart gave away

I'm just a cog in the 9 to 5 wheel

I have played till tears poured red

I'm not sure anymore, how I feel

Chorus

I've given all I had, you gotta give me that

I Lift the Skin of the Sea
Written on December 21, 2000

The title came from a painting by Salvador Dali. The lyrics were about how my crippling depression was affecting my marriage and my musical aspirations. I wanted it to sound like a nightmare and Jerrod (the producer and engineer) did a great job of making the harmonica (which I play in the key of E, as the song plays in the key of EM) sound twisted. Like a mournful train whistle from hell. I love this song,  but others hate it, I've been told it's too scary... mission accomplished, I say.

Lyrics

You look at me, like I'm some kind of freak

You look at me, like, I'm some kind of stranger

Over 10 years ago, we could never know

One day you'd look at me, like, your in some kind of danger

I lift the skin of the sea, I lift the skin of the sea

I lift the skin of the sea, rest my head and let it wash over me

Can I hope to aspire, can I touch the sun

You reach so much higher, you've found the end when I've just begun



Ophelia... In and Out of Focus
Written on March 16, 2001

A song about insanity, suicide, and medication. A precursor to my other Ophelia song. Uses a capo on the 2nd fret and a chord I didn't use a lot, maybe this was the first for an Amaj7 - Nice skewed sound, words are weird (sweltering red? I dunno, can't remember what that meant). On paper, it looks like I tried to write a bridge, but scraped that and don't remember what it sounded like.

Lyrics

Ophelia drifts in and out of focus, but you can never understand her smile

I've been there, gliding through this opus, crashing through the ice beneath my feet

And oh, oh, it's a terrible sound

Oh its the best thing I ever found

Oh, oh, it's heaven wrapped in hell

And oh the stories I can tell, oh the stories I can tell

It's moist like quicksand, this sweltering red

No one knows what goes on in my head

Can't breathe this air, thick and sickly sweet

Watching my pills wear away beneath the weight of this heat



Levin's Heart is Burning
Written on May 2002

"Levin" was inspired by a character in Tolstoy's Anna Karenina that I related to. This was a song I fought with. Lost, found, and rewrote with an upbeat folky melody. I never perform this one, and the title makes me think of antacid. Maybe I can sell it to TUMS,

Lyrics

Levin's heart is burning, aching for his purpose in the great eternal

I possess his body, I see through the amber glare in his eyes.

Levin's heart is burning, Levin's soul is yearning

Levin's mind is turning like a wheel, searching for something real

Swollen pink puffy skin, of a life indulging every whim

These are the things that give offense to him

Rub the cold earth from his eyes

Cutting through the scar tissue worn as a disguise

Chorus

What is left but empty words, empty words, and hollow deeds

No deep glowing coal burns in their creeds

Rub the cold earth from his eyes

Cutting through the scar tissue worn as a disguise

What is real what is true, what endures when it's all through

What haunts that furrowed brow, what saves a soul in the here and now

Levin's heart is burning, Levin's mind is turning

Levin's heart is burning, Levin's soul is yearning

Levin's mind is turning like a wheel, searching for something real