Track 6: Selections from "Who Breaks A Butterfly..."

I came across a stack of old songs from around 1999. Some I couldn't remember, most were m'eh and a few were worth saving on CD. I also had about 6 new songs, and I took a wee sliver of an unfinished one I found on cassette and re-worked it. I titled it "From Saturn with Love". I recorded them all and collected them on this Demo.

For the fun of it, I made a mock album cover for this CD. It's based on the Beatles' US release, "Something New" (the song titles are real... the movie isn't)

While I was being playful with the cover - the CD title is actually a quote from Alexander Pope and can be taken as referring to putting massive effort into achieving something minor or unimportant.

Here are a handful of tunes from that demo



The King of Scorn
Written in August 2010

I believe this was party inspirated by XTCs "The Disappointed", where the singer is the spokesman for the broken hearted. Here, I'm just the king of scorn, the fool happily wrapped around her finger, and he doesn't even get a crown or a throne. I liked the guitar strum.

Lyrics
The last time I was happy, was watching you writhe sensually
Watching you glide slowly in the dark, circling me like a shark
In that green dress, Christ I thought I'd died and gone to my reward

Ushered by a choir of angel
Ushered to the front of the line
Occupied by the deaf and the blind
Seated on my thorn, I'm the king of scorn, king of scorn



From Saturn with Love
Written originally in 2000, rewritten on August 19, 2010

I really dig this thing, I wish the demo was more polished, I would have loved to have taken this in a pro studio with a full band.

I'm a Bond nut, hence the title. The original recording on cassette was just that opening verse, nonsense lyrics, but I used them as the foundation for finishing up the number. By 2010 I could no longer reach those high notes, so I tuned the guitar back to D to get it in my vocal range (I so miss my teen voice).

Lyrics

Prepare for takeoff (guitar slides from left channel to right)

Don't you know what you're thinking?

There's something out there looking in

My love is falling from a million miles away

Tumbling through the milky way

Astro Annie prepares for flight (pilots to the platform)

Do you want to talk or fight

It's not easy, looking at your crying eyes

A part of me dies with each goodbye

Rockets at the ready, kiss me again before you go

Fly her true and steady, past the planets above

From Saturn with love, from Saturn with love, from Saturn with love

Don't forget to write, send/sign your best wishes every night

From Saturn with love, from Saturn with love

Every night I sit on our porch swing

And gaze at a twinkling field of stars

Astro Annie when you're sailing through your cosmic sea

Are you out there looking back at me

Don't you know what you're thinking

Because I think I must be losing my mind

My love is falling from a million miles away

Tumbling through the milky way

Chorus



Losing My Mind
Written on August 18, 2010

Lyrics say it all, you get older, you look back, and wonder how you got to this place; this wasn't part of the plan. I wanted to repeat the title in the same way Rogue Wave did with "Eyes", the only problem is, it sounds exactly the same! You're supposed to put your own spin on things like that -sigh- Well, if it becomes a major hit I'll owe Rogue Wave a bit of the royalties. 😉

Lyrics

Losing my mind (8x)

Now I don't believe half the things I'm saying

The edges have started fraying

When I was a kid, couldn't wait for this day, now I've lost my way

Now I'm losing my mind...

Thought I'd be a lot clearer

I thought age would bring wisdom

I thought age would bring calm

But I'm just as lost, but I'm just as blind

But I'm losing my mind...

No one wants to face the possibility

That they might have been wrong all of this time

Losing my mind



Last Night
Written around 2010?

I don't know where this song went. I can't find the original tabs and lyrics, don't have any notes on it. If not for the demo it might have been lost forever. Thematically it's coming from the same place as the next song on this page. This one is a stream of consciousness conversation about life and regrets, filled with contradiction, admission then deflection, and vows

Lyrics

Last night you said, my heart is dead, but I still have my good intentions

I have become the negligible sum due to my schemes and inventions

And the high and mighty they hide a cache of frilly lace panties

Which linger in their memory like a gnawing toothache

As they sing their hymns in their Church of choice

I'm no hypocrite my sins lay bare, drawn on my forehead in ash

I suppose that doesn't help when you're strung out and burning and short on cash

And I wonder how it got this bad, guess I over-compensated for the things I lack

Pulled on the tiger's tail and the tiger finally bit back

Now I'm caught in a trap, this little cage

I flutter back and forth, silly bird your not going far

You'll never get further than where you are

Well at least I'm not a hypocrite my sins are there for all to see

I'm not my mother's daughter of that I'm certain, that's a certainty

Last night you said, my heart is dead, but good intentions spill from my head

My parents list their demands and sleep in separate beds

And I'll never go back, last night, last night that's what you said

That's what you said



Last Night, You Said
Lyrics written on Aug 20, 2010, music 1999

The original music had no chorus, but one popped into my head pretty quickly on the re-write. With most of the tracks on the CD, I tuned the acoustic guitar down to D, and that was the case here, though when I added the electric lead I kept it at regular tuning, does it sound a little off? 

The lyrics were partially inspired by a conversation with someone who was feeling depressed, coupled to something I saw on TV, about a woman who was dreamt into existence.  The line about 'feeling only what you want me to feel' came from her saying that she was trying so hard to make everyone else happy, to be what they wanted, that she'd lost her sense of self.

Lyrics

Last night, you said, it's all in your head

I'm just a ghost you conjured one night

I can't escape, I'm not even real

I only feel what you want me to feel

So don't look away or I could disappear

It could all be a dream, you could wake up, and break up, again

Last night

Last night, you said, you can't wake the dead

You can't embrace what isn't there

So don't look away or I could disappear

It could all be a dream, you could wake up, and break down, again

Last night

(But I told her) last night, I found one love was true

And that love was always you